So by now some of you have probably noticed that there hasn’t been a lot of updating happening to this website, either in terms of posts or pictures… and even a few cancelled streams. Today I wanted to take some time during my lunch at work to share a little bit of insight into why the updates have slowed… and offer some idea of what is to come, although it will be a vague idea at best.
Most of you guys know by now that while I am generally a pretty happy guy (at least I hope so), I have my moments where I struggle with self esteem issues and depression. Well, the past few weeks have seen me struggle with these issues a lot. I won’t go into the meat of what is behind this – partially because I’d really prefer not to and partially because it’s extremely hard to put into words, but it has left me without the energy or motivation to write. I sit here staring at a page with 5 articles at various states of completion(two of which I have nothing but titles for) and wonder if today I’ll actually get to write… if today motivation or inspiration will hit me. It’s an awful feeling. Things are starting to look up, as can be seen by the fact that I’m able to write this. I tried to get this started once last week, but it wasn’t happening. So again, sorry about the delays. Hopefully now that I’ve been able to do this, some of the 5 drafts I have started will start to happen, but I just can’t make any promises.
The other half of this whole thing is work. Don’t get me wrong, I love my job. I really do. But we’ve been so understaffed these past 3 weeks that it always feels like we’re impossibly behind. Talking to one of my friends at work I described it as ‘feeling like we’re sitting in a leaking boat trying to plug the leaks with our fingers, but we just don’t have enough fingers’. This, combined with the above and my normal sleep deprivation issues, has left me so exhausted I can hardly think at the end of a lot of days. I’m shocked I’ve only cancelled one stream during this due to exhaustion.
As for this month, fortunately this is a fairly quiet month in terms of releases which means, if I can get on track, I can finish up the few remaining anime reviews for spring, write up my reviews for I Am Setsuna and Star Ocean 5, and then do my winter/spring anime wrap-up.
We’ll see where this all goes, but hopefully we’ll be back in the right direction sooner rather than later.